As I was planning our month-long trip to Europe, a strange thing happened. I started to feel really sad that I hadn’t traveled more. When I was in my 20’s, I lived in London. I envisioned myself coming back to Europe many times throughout my life. But this trip will be the first since then. Over 20 years have gone by.
I was afraid to share this with my friends since I thought they’d think I was nuts for being sad when I was about to go such an awesome trip. One friend immediately tried to cheer me up by pointing out all the cool travel I’ve done in the past and that I still could go back to Europe in the future. But that was missing the point. I needed to mourn the trips I didn’t take.
During those 20 years, I chose to dive into personal growth. I changed my career more than once. I traveled to Mexico and Morocco, besides other beautiful places in the US. I moved, by myself, across the country to a place I totally love in the Southwest. I became a belly dancer. I built an amazing green house. I lived in and experienced the Pacific Northwest. I met and married a wonderful man.
No matter how well you choose in life, I still think there’s time when we’ll mourn what we didn’t choose. It felt good to allow myself that period of mourning. It got me in touch with the full passion of my life. It actually released me to enjoy this coming trip on a level I wouldn’t have experienced if I had tried to ignore those sad feelings and push them aside. Embracing the sadness when it was here has made my life so much richer.